History isn’t always about battles or political intrigue. Sometimes, it can be about how something as simple as passing wind can change a life or affect society.
Today we’ll be looking at the lives of four historical men and see their relationship with this bodily function. We’ll see how farting could earn you fame, exile, spiritual peace, or inspire new ideas.
Roland the Farter and King Henry II
Let’s start with Roland, whose flatulent talents set him up well in life…
In 12th-century England, during the reign of King Henry II, Roland the Farter was a court entertainer. And his speciality? You guessed it – farting. But this wasn’t your normal passing of wind. That surely wouldn’t entertain a king. No, he had a special act – it was “a jump, a whistle, and a fart.”
It’s hard to imagine that being called entertainment, and surely there must have been a bit more to it. It might sound ridiculous to us, but in a time when there was no television, internet, or streaming, I guess the bar for entertainment was pretty low.
However, it was apparently a really great show, as he was required to perform it every year at Christmas for the King himself. And as payment for his extremely entertaining show, Roland received… a manor house and 110 acres of land.
Roland’s story shows us that 12th century humor could be rather earthy but also quite lucrative. Would you jump, whistle, and fart once a year for a manor house? I think I might give it a go…
Edward de Vere and Queen Elizabeth I
About 400 years after Roland farted his way into a big, fancy house, Queen Elizabeth I was on the throne, and she was a bit more formal. Breaking wind in her court wasn’t as funny as in the past, and it definitely didn’t earn rewards.
Edward de Vere was the 17th Earl of Oxford, a poet, and a favorite of Her Majesty. As the story goes, Eddie was bowing in silent, respectful reverence to his queen when a loud, long, rumbling fart escaped his clenched cheeks.
He was mortified – so embarrassed, in fact, that he promptly backed out of the room, left the court, and even left the country. He went abroad for seven years to forget his windy faux pas. As the years passed, he figured everyone had forgotten his humiliation, and he finally felt it was safe to return to England.
When he eventually saw Queen Elizabeth again, he was relieved to see that she greeted him warmly with a gracious smile. And then she said something like: Lord de Vere, it’s so good to see you again. And don’t worry, we’ve forgotten all about the fart. Ouch! She obviously hadn’t forgotten…
It just didn’t seem fair. Roland farted in court and was rewarded with applause and a big house, while poor Eddie was exiled by embarrassment.
Martin Luther and His Windy Theology
While passing wind in the English court was frowned upon, over in Germany, the Protestant reformer, Martin Luther had very different ideas…
Martin Luther is remembered mainly for nailing his criticisms of religion to church doors. However, what is less well known is that he also had a fondness for talking about farting.
For him, passing wind had theological value. He preached against false holiness and argued that humans were physical creatures, so digestion – and the gasses and noises it produced – weren’t shameful. They were simply proof of our humanity.
But even more than that, they could be used against our spiritual enemy – the devil. If the devil came to tempt you, you could just laugh at him and fart in his face. That’s what Martin did. He claimed that when he was plagued by temptation, he would laugh, joke… and even fart to drive Satan away.
So Martin Luther probably would have approved of Eddie farting in front of the queen, but he would have liked it even better if it had been a pope… or the devil.
Benjamin Franklin and the Big Question
Let’s fast forward another 200 years or so. In 1783 America was still fighting for its independence, and Benjamin Franklin was supporting the newly formed nation’s war effort while living in Paris and serving as the ambassador to France.
Like Martin Luther, Ben was a very practical and down to earth man. He also thought that farting was a natural function, and something should be done to make it more acceptable.
During his lifetime, Ben was many things – including a prolific inventor. He focused on finding solutions to common problems and improving the quality of life.
So, one morning as he was reading his newspaper, Ben saw that a prize was being offered for solving a mathematical problem. It inspired him to write a satirical essay to that Society that went something like this:
Dear Gentlemen…
I’ve seen your mathematical question, and I must assume that you couldn’t think of anything more useful. So, allow me to humbly suggest a practical question – something for the scientists, physicians, and chemists of our enlightened age to tackle.
It’s very well known, that when we humans digest our food, a great quantity of wind is produced. And when this wind escapes, the odor that accompanies it is usually offensive to those in the vicinity.
This leads polite people to try to hold it in. However, this is a dangerous practice that can lead to long-term health issues and sometimes even death.
If it weren’t for the bad smell, people wouldn’t hesitate to “let it rip.” So here’s my Prize Question: Can someone please invent a harmless, tasty additive to be mixed with food that would turn these natural gas emissions into something not only inoffensive, but as pleasant-smelling as perfume?
Think of the benefits: People could finally release gas freely in company without embarrassment, maybe even pleasing others with fragrant aromas. Compared to this, even the cleverest math puzzles or Newton’s laws don’t have nearly the same everyday usefulness.
So, I submit this problem as a challenge of universal usefulness – one that could improve life for everyone and might even make the world a little happier. At least it would smell better.
So even with Ben’s duties as ambassador, he was still trying to solve the problems of humanity and do something about those smelly emissions.
You can read Ben’s entire letter here.
These four stories show us that, throughout history, passing wind has been regarded as entertainment, a source of embarrassment, a spiritual weapon, and even the subject of satire. They show us that sometimes, a well-timed fart can leave a mark on history far larger than anyone would expect.
And there is one more “Mad Farter” that I should mention, Joseph Pujol who, like Roland, turned his farting into lucrative entertainment. At the end of the 19th century, he was the highest paid performer at the Moulin Rouge in Paris. But I’ve written an entire article on him. You can read it here: The Mad Farter
What do you think about all this passing of wind? Let me know in the comments section. And if you want to read more of my curious histories, subscribe to my blog (at the top or bottom of this page).
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